Beginning the Process of Spiritual Ascension (for real!)

30 07 2007

ok, as far as I can tell, the following steps are involved –

1. DNA activation: the human coding apparently has dormant strands.  The new age will awaken these, and complete the 12 strands of a perfected being.  What powers await, I don’t know (seeing the future, knowing all the past, perfect memory??)

2. photonic beams: part of this transformative process involves receiving light from the Central Sun (the sun in the middle of our Galaxy).  The year 2012 brings us into a grand alignment where the earth will be bathed in highly energetic photonic beams.  (bring your sunscreen!)

3. physical ascension: absorbing all this light will turn us into light creatures ourselves.  Apparently, we become so light and ethereal we are able to actually dematerialise, and become pure light beings

4. Oneness: i am you, and you are me (I don’t know how this works, surely we get confused about who is who??)

5. Kundalini Explosion: this is a super orgasmic event along the chakra lines, ie up the central spine from the base or root chakra, all the way up through to the Crown Chakra, the halo around your head.  This is supposed to feel fantastic

skeptical?! welcome to the New New Age!

(this piece has been severely tongue-in-cheek, no offence to the serious spiritual seekers, I am one with you 🙂

ggw

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One response

30 07 2007
whig

It is consonant with many revelatory writings.

I prefer to make the paradise here, and if it comes to nothing in a great disaster, well then we tried.

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